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HW Dispatch

News for Happy Women

HW Dispatch #8

-Soy Drinks a "Terrorist Plot"

-Supermodel Resumes Eating

-Company Creates "Extreme" Jobs

-Instant Messaging Causes Cancer

HW Dispatch #7

- Ashton Kutcher Dating Self

- Flockhart's Son Outweighs Her

- Publisher Scraps Plans for Madonna's Children's Books

- Pamela Anderson Discusses Near-Death Experience

- Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck Not in the News Today

HW Dispatch #6

-Saddam Found Alive in Roswell,

- New Mexico Woman has Half a Notion not to Tip Hairdresser

- Pepper Spray an Effective Deterrent for SARS Virus

- Supermodel Files Federal Suit Against Gravity

HW Dispatch #5

-Martha Stewart to Redecorate Wall Street in Plea Agreement

-Woman Wins Case with "Distractive Eyebrow" Defense

-Michigan Cedes Upper Peninsula to Wisconsin

HW Dispatch #4

-Montana Woman Concedes Defeat

-Children's Game Goes Wrong, Proves Adage

-Cosmetics Now to be Tested on PETA Members

HW Dispatch #3

-Mother who Forgot to Call Olly-Olly-Oxen-Free Jailed for Child Abuse

-Drug Czar Announces Tupperware Added to Controlled Substance List

-Woman Fails to Sell Newspaper Collection at Auction, Sues eBay

-Model rejects Darwinian Theory

-Indiana Woman claims Regis Philbin is stealing her material.

HW Dispatch #2

-Widow comes clean after 40 years of lying

-Seniors sick of "lame-ass" entertainment vow not to clap.

HW Dispatch #1

-Anthrax Scare at Fashion Show

-Midland Area Woman Walks for Peace

-Clown College Grad Accused of Plagiarism