 The
Happy Woman Rules
(Track
Him, Trick Him, Trap Him!)
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Keeping
It Going
Once he's
in your sight keep him there, get him a pager or cellular phone.
In an email
relationship send him jokes and 'tell a friend' pages. That way you
will be constantly on his mind. Make sure you email four for every one
one of his.
If you
are in a long distance relationship you may wish to move to be closer
to him. Wait until after the first date though as you don't want to
appear desperate.
Be someone
else. Study successful thin attached people and become them. Quiz your
prospect on what he likes in a woman, then adopt those characteristics.
If he
doesn't call it doesn't mean he's not interested. It could
be that he is very busy, that he forgot your telephone number, that
he has been in a terrible traffic accident and has amnesia. He may need
little reminders.
Start out
with calling and hanging-up. This works as it puts him in the area of
the telephone and the ringing sound may jog his memory of you.
Cruise
past his house frequently, make friends with his beer drinking buddies,
take his aunt in the retirement home to the zoo.
There is
a chance that you could end up with Mr. Wrong but don't despair. Keep
a close eye on his behaviour during the dating period.
Keep notes
and charts and give him updates. When you find an undesirable characteristic
it is your job to change him. Whimpering, whining sulking and screaming
are all terrific molding methods.
Remember:
Let's just be friends means he wants you and wants you bad he just can't
deal with his feelings yet.
The
Next Step
If you've
followed the steps above you are ready to close the deal. Happy Woman
do not date men over two years without getting an engagement ring.
You can
force his hand by dating others, having children or if all else fails
take him off the market. You can do this by spreading a rumour he has
an STD, that he's a bigamist or a bankrupt.
If you
find that you are still not having any success with The Happy Woman
rules you will need to motivate yourself. Slogans like "I am nothing
without a man" or "I'm single because I'm fat" will keep
you on the right track.
You're
Welcome!
©2000-2008 Sharon
Grehan-Howes www.happywomanmagazine.com
Please Note: This
is a parody of a magazine, so don't come crying to us if someone accidentally
took out your liver or you starved to death on our diet.
The interviews are not real and the interviewers
are not real.
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