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Jenna's Diary appears biweekly
February 7
I had to call in sick again today
and my mother is furious. I wish she'd try to be more understanding!
She just doesn't seem to get it. I am absolutely certain that
it's a case of out of sight out of mind with Rod so it absolutely
necessary that I keep a high profile. I've been meeting him
after the show every single night and going with the cast
to La Creole for drinks.
The terrific thing is I have not
seen Kris, nor has Rod mentioned him! Whooo hooo! I think
if I keep this up then the Jenna magic will work and Kris
will fade into the distance. I don't want to come out and
ask Rod what happened to him because I'm pretending I'm OK
with the gay thing.
While Kris has been out of sight
Tabetha hasn't. I don't know what it is with her she is
such a hanger-on. It is sooooo pathetic. She follows us
to the restaurant and just sits and moons at him. She doesn't
seem to get that It is over between them that she is just
his roommate- period. If I liked her I'd probably have a word
with her but I don't so I won't.
Unfortunately these late nights
are killing me. Because all they do is talk about their boring
stupid show I have to drink to stay conscious. I found a website
that gives terrific seduction tips. The way you sit, the way
you play with your straw when you drink, the way you play
with your hair - all of these have to be carefully measured
and it takes a lot of concentration. It also means I have
to drink Margaritas because nothing else I like comes with
a straw.
So far I haven't had a lot of success.
Rod is still so warm and affectionate towards me but I've
noticed that he treats me the same way he treats everyone
except I get more hugs. I don't know if that's because I sit
closer to him than anyone else or genuine affection.
I talked to Irene and she is no
help whatsoever. I was telling her how much I love him and
she said "Jenna, if you really love him, can't you just
accept him as a friend?"
She is such a moron. No wonder her
husband left.
I can't go on like this though.
All this drinking is starting to show on me. I'm getting a
little puffy and my skin has a grey cast but I just can't
think of what else to do!
Jenny says that I'm making a big
mistake by being so available. She skimmed through "The
Rules" once and now she's a big fat expert. She said
I asked her if that applied to men who might be just a little
bit gay and she said no. Ha!
February 10
Rod had a dinner party at his house
last night and I went over to help him prepare. Oh God was
that wonderful! Bustling around the kitchen chopping, dicing,
slicing - it had a wonderful cozy feel to it. It felt so right.
I think it's good for him to see
me in this role. All he's been seeing so far is the glamorous
witty Jenna but now I've given him a taste of Jenna the homebody.
Tabetha kept slinking into the kitchen to glare but I ignored
her. Rod was so impressed
with my homemade Key Lime pie! I
bought it at Alfredo's then transferred it to my own dish.
I smoothed out the scalloped whip cream edging so that it
looked a little more rustic and burned a tiny bit of the crust
with a lighter to add to the homemade illusion. It was a huge
hit. There was a bit of an awkward moment when some stupid
buttinsky wanted the recipe but other than that I got away
with it.
I took charge setting the table,
serving the food and making sure everyone had wine. It was
perfec.t I was definitely the hostess with the mostest and
I'm sure Rod noticed.
. I wonder if there really is cheese
in a Key Lime pie.
February 12
Hmmmmmmm. Went to see "Adaptation"
last night with Rod and a few people from the show. I got
a great seat on the aisle right next to him and excused myself
to go to the washroom. When I came back Kris was sitting in
it! KRIS!
According to Diane, one of the
serving wenches from the show, Kris has been on a Bun King
Tour. I told him that he was sitting in my seat but Rod said
"Jenna there's loads of room down at the end." My
heart felt like it was going to beat clear out of my chest.
I have no idea what that movie was
about because I kept my eye on Rod and Kris all the way through.
I have never felt so jealous in my life! There didn't seem
to be any contact between them except for 2 hand brushes in
the popcorn barrel. They were 43 minutes apart so they probably
were accidental, but still.
After the show we went for coffee.
I made sure to wedge myself between Kris and Rod on the walk
there and at the coffee shop. God!I have no idea how to compete
with a man. My only course of action was to show Kris how
close Rod and I are. I put the cream and sugar in Rod's coffee
and said "Now mister only one cup for you, you need a
good night's sleep!" Later
on when Rod told a joke I said "Oh, here comes that old
chestnut!"I think I may have gone too far when I wiped
Rod's mouth with a wetnap but all in all I think I got the
message across.
We all walked to subway and Rod
gave me a peck goodnight saying he thought he'd walk the few
blocks home. I said I'd go with him but he said it was far
too cold.
I noticed that Kris was hanging
back so I asked him which way he was going and he said east
and I said "Great so am I!" I grabbed his arm and
pulled him into the station. I'm not sure if he heard Rod
asking me why I was going east when I lived west but it served
the purpose of separating them and it was only 8 stops out
of my way.
I made sure during our train ride
to impress upon him how close Rod and I are. Honestly I don't
know what Rod sees in him. Sure he's good looking but he hardly
says a word. I really got a chance to size him up and my conclusion?
He is no match for the Jenna-meister!
February 14 Valentine's Day
Rod, Tabetha and Robyn all came
down with the stomach flu and I rushed over immediately to
minister to him. He was deathly ill - what a stroke of luck!
Robyn was crashed out on the couch
and looked like a corpse and I heard Tabetha moaning in her
room. Every ten minutes or so you'd hear someone run to the
washroom and then a huge "Brrrrraaaaccccckkk" or
"Pshhhhooooockkkkllllsssss" depending on what end
was exploding.
I put a bucket by Rod's bed to save
him the trip and it was really sweet because he kept begging
me to leave.I was so touched because he didn't want me to
see him like that. Surely that shows his depth of feeling!
I ignored him and said "There's no way you're getting
rid of me mister!"
After a while he slept so I popped
round to the store to pick up some things like fruit, ginger
ale and kitchen curtains.Their medicine cabinet was a complete
mess so I re- organized it and alphabetized their household
bills.
Kris phoned and asked for Rod and
I said "Oh, my poor baby's in bed!" he asked me
to tell him he called and I said I would. (Yeah, right.)
Rod stirred woke up around ten and
I rushed to the kitchen to prepare some food. Consommé,
fresh bread, dry crackers, grapes and ginger ale. Tabetha
lurched into the kitchen as I was laying the tray and said
"Oh, good I'm famished!" I told
her she had some gook on her face and brought the tray into
Rod. He nibbled a bit, thanked me and told me to go home,
that I'd done enough. I said that he wasn't getting rid of
me that easy and settled myself on their couch for the night.
Jenna, the sophisticate, Jenna the
wit, Jenna the wife and now Jenna the angel of mercy!
I really think I've turned things
around. Happy V-Day to me!
New to Jenna's Diary?
You are probably thinking"Say, I'll never catch up, so there's no point starting now."
Well that's not true, Jenna can't follow a thought for more than a second so you won't be missing a thing. (And quite frankly that attitude is the reason you are not a neurosurgeon.)
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