Jenna's Diary appears every Friday.

Dec 29

I just knew there was a catch, I just knew it! There is no way my mother is going to do anything unless there is something in it for her.

I was having a ball with the new computer and she phones to see how I'm getting on. She expressed a lot of interest, which should have made me suspicious because she is never interested in anything I do, and just before she hangs up she says "Jenna, there is a program on your computer called Exel. You'll be needing that for record keeping once the store opens."

I could scream. I was having so much fun and I was only half way through the fonts.

This stinks, and to top it all off I have to find something to do tomorrow night. There is no way I'm spending it alone staring at my mother's betrayal while still getting over Michael's betrayal.

I called Jenny and Irene and left messages. I don't really want to spend it with either one of them but I'm kind of desperate.

Dec 30

I called Jenny and she said that they were just having a quiet evening in but I was welcome to join them. She said she'd make a special dinner, we'd have a few drinks and a few laughs. It's better than nothing I guess, I told her I'd love to come.

When I think of how it could have been. Michael and I up at the cottage toasting the New Year. We'd bundle up on the couch and...well we could probably play cards. Instead he'll probably spend it with that swamp witch Megan and my new family.

How could he have done this to me? To abuse my trust and take advantage of my good nature and this the holiest time of the year. I wish I was still born-again that way my condemning him would carry more weight.

Dec 31

Irene called and invited me to go out with her and her fiancé. They're going to meet up with a Paul's friends at a bar, I told her I'd love to come. I phoned Jenny about the change of plans, how I would really enjoy going out and having fun instead of going to her place and she hung up on me.

She is so selfish.

What am I going to wear?

Jan 1 2001

I MET SOMEONE!!! I can't believe it!!!! His name is Jim and he's Paul's friend.

Irene neglected to mention that it was going to be couples so the evening started out really crappy. Paul's friends are even more boring than Paul so I just started drinking and was already planning my post party cry when Jim came in at 10:30.

I think he's about six feet tall, slim with close-cropped kinky brown or blond hair. I felt an instant attraction when he came to our table looked around and said "this looks like the morgue."

Pretty soon we moved off to the bar and were laughing our heads off.

We kissed at midnight and I felt sparks.

This is going to be my year!!!!!!

Jan 2

Jim called at 2:00 yesterday and suggested we spend the day together. There wasn't anything open so I invited him over. We opened a bottle of wine and spent the afternoon laughing and talking. He does the most amazing impression of Urkel it is uncanny. He is such a riot. He also has this cute habit of purposely mispronouncing words.

It was all very chaste. After the Michael debacle I'm not taking any chances.

We finished off three bottles of wine and he went home somewhere between 10:00 and 1:00.

I was too hungover to go to work so Brittany had to cover for me.

Jan 3

I find myself thinking about him all day. It almost makes the flea market and Brittany bearable.

My mother and Mr. Van Heusan took me to see the new store after work. I fully expected it to be empty but I found out that they are actually only renting a portion of the store, about a quarter of the space. The lease is held by a company that sells imported birdseed and antique linen. (Talk about your one-stop shopping).

It was pretty nice though. It's a century building with huge windows high ceilings with this really pretty molding and hardwood floors. The bird people have decorated it really nice. I guess you have to go that extra mile if you want to convince people that wild birds need thistle seed.

Jim left a message saying that he wanted to talk and suggested that we meet.

That's never good news. Oh, God I hope he doesn't dump me, I haven't even had a chance to make Michael jealous.

Jan 4

There was thankfully nothing to worry about.

Jim felt that if we were going to get to know one another he should tell me all about himself.

We went to Austin's Cafe shop and I sat with fingers crossed and listened, waiting for key words like "homicide" or "parole officer" but there was nothing of that sort. It was mostly stuff like "I was born in a small town" and "when I was two" and "high school was the happiest time of my life" "I had to get counseling to deal with my depression"

We met at 5:00 and he talked until 11:30--even then he was only up to college but the cafe was closing.

While I was relieved that he wasn't wanted by the law I have to admit that after the first four hours I was kind of hoping for at least a drug conviction and by the sixth hour a murder would have at least perked up the story.

But---he wants to share with me!!! I think that's wonderful!!! I have spent so many years mining the guys I've dated for information that it's so refreshing to have someone put all their cards on the table.

The only sour point was when the bill came. 5 Cappuccino each at 3.75 a pop not including tax and tip. Jim forgot his wallet so I had to find an ATM.

We're meeting tomorrow so that he can finish but I hope we go to a bar. For fifty dollars I expect more than jangled nerves, an upset stomach and a furry tongue.