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Jenna
appears every Friday.
July 8th
My mom and
Mr. Van Heusan took me out to Vesuvios to celebrate my birthday. It used
to be my favourite place to eat until I became sophisticated.
All through
the meal, (which although pedestrian, was good) I wished Simon was there
with me. I imagined how we would roll our eyes at the menu and my mother's
middle class values. How we would share a secret smile when they ordered
garlic bread with extra cheese and asked for Thousand Island dressing.
I MISS HIM
SO MUCH! But I know it takes time. I've never been the pushy type so I
want us to take things slow. I think patience is one of my best qualities.
They talked
about stupid stuff all through the meal: who's coming to the wedding,
who's not, how they have Mr. Van Heusan's house on the market, how business
is doing, how Mr. Van Heusan's former father-in-law is dying blah, blah,
blah. Really unimportant stuff. It wasn't until dessert that I was finally
able to get a word in and I told them about me sending my stuff out to
publishers.
I thought
maybe they would order some champagne and my mom would take my hand and
say "I'm proud of you darling." and Mr. Van Heusan would say
"Wave to me when you get to the top" because he always makes
stupid jokes, but they didn't say anything. They just looked at me, nodded
and ordered Key Lime Pie.
They just
don't get it!!! I wanted to say something, to shake them out of mediocrity
but I held my tongue and thought about it.
I have different
values. While they are all caught up in the dreary day-to-day stuff, weddings,
death, work, money. I am operating on a higher plane. People like Simon
and me, we don't care about the mundane, the material, we are seeking
answers to the bigger questions. In a way I pity them. I guess I can't
expect them to understand. I was really impressed with my insight and
as I ate my pie I was able to smile at them benevolently.
My mom got
me a watch, I wanted a Palm Pilot.
July 12th
There was
nothing in the mail today, how long does it take? It's been a week all
ready!
Jenny phoned
and we had a long talk. It was great. I told her about Simon and what's
been happening and she agrees with me. He just needs time to absorb everything,
that he is probably frightened by his feelings and that my best bet is
to take it slow.
Jenny is
a true friend.
Then we
got onto the subject of Irene. I found out Jenny is a little ticked off
at her for not calling. Jenny says Irene spends so much time with the
writing group she doesn't have any time for her friends. She said it hurts
her especially because she is a new mom and would appreciate support from
her friends. Irene hasn't even been to see the baby in six weeks!
I agreed,
Irene can be so totally selfish. Jenny needs all the help she can get
right now. I told Jenny about some of the awful stuff Irene wrote for
the group and she couldn't believe Irene could be so deluded.
She's become
so self absorbed neither one of us know what to do about it. I told Jenny
about Irene sending her stuff off to publishers and we laughed and then
I told her about me sending my stuff off and she congratulated me.
We had a
great talk and just before she hung up she asked if she could use the
cottage next weekend. I told her sure! That's what friends are for!
I've really
got to get a present for Jenny's baby. I wish I could remember if it is
a he or a she.
July 15th
Oh, my God,
oh my God oh my God! My hands are still shaking! I came home from work
and found a letter from Southern Edge
Publishing !
I took a
big gulp of wine before I read it. It was fantastic! Oh my God!!!! I can't
believe it!!
Wow, imagine
someone thinking I'd created a whole new art form! I don't know what meta-neo-drama-parody-parody
is exactly, but because I created it I guess I don't have to know.
I love that
he called Jayde sophisticated--it is soooo totally true.
He said "we
feel that we need more to work with than you have presented to us."
so I wrote to ask him how much he'd pay me to send some more. Hopefully
it will get to him before they move.
Interesting
too, that he suggested I get into children's books. I should find out
how much that pays first before I go to the trouble of writing one. It
might be an idea-- it wouldn't be as much work as a novel because there
won't be as many words involved.
I can't believe
it!!! Wait until Simon hears that I've created a brand new art form!
July 17th
I got another
letter today!!!!! It's from Diamond
Back Publishing. Oh I've got to catch my breath. I am so excited!!!
In my memoirs,
I think I will entitle this chapter of my life The Turning Point
or Who's Laughing Now?"
The letter
said "we were particularly excited about your work."
I can't
believe it, I didn't expect universal acceptance so soon. My gosh!
Imagine.
They posted my work on their bulletin board. I can just see all these
people standing around reading MY WORK and saying stuff like. "Wow."
One thing
I don't understand: why after praising my work to high heaven did they
say they couldn't publish it?
It could
be because I said in my query it was first come first serve. They probably
assumed that Random House all ready picked it up. I'm tempted to write
back and tell them if it doesn't work out with the bigger houses I will
consider them in the future.
It's the
least I can do.
I wonder
how Irene is doing with her work--oh, no that was mean. Now that I'm on
top of the world I can afford charity. I really do wish her well. Not
better, but well.
I could hardly
wait to phone Jenny and tell her, she was so excited. We both agreed that
I'm a great talent and it's about time things were happening for me. She
is such a great friend. She's going to pick up the keys to cottage next
week.
I left a
message for Simon, it's so hard to get in touch with him now that his
show is on. I also told him about the cottage and how it would be great
to go on a writing retreat.
I can just
see him coming in the door exhausted from a night of clowning. He'll take
off his nose, maybe get a pop or a beer before he heads off to bed. Just
before he does, he'll check his messages. He'll hear the one from me,
smile and say a jubilant "Yes!"
This is all
so much for me. I could cry.
I going
to make a few resolutions though. I can't let success change me. I've
got to fight hard to remain exactly the same.
Good for
me! I ROCK!
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