PUBLISHED MONTHLY
EST. May 2000 (AD)

 
 

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LIBBY INTERVIEWS...
OPRAH WINFREY

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Oprah

Yes, O was launched April of this year, what I wanted to do was take the word and allow people not only to read it, but to embrace it and share it with other people.

Libby

Whooooops!!! Now, will you look at that! How did that happen? I can't believe all my clippings just fell out!

Oh, my gosh there's my interview with Calista, nice thin girl great role model, Rosie pretty face, Kathie Lee Gifford, Darva Conger--poor poor Darva, I'm going to fix her up with my nephew.

Well this is certainly embarrassing to have my body of work just fall at the feet of the Empress of Entertainment.

Oprah

Uh, huh, anyway my target audience is confident women 25-49 who...

Libby

That's funny.

Oprah

What is?

Libby

That's the kind of audience I write for--kind of an eerie coincidence don't you think?

Oprah

Well...not really, as most women's magazines are catering to the same audience....

Libby

Yes I agree it's really eerie. It' s almost like we have a bond.

I always think to myself if I wasn't stuck at Happy Woman even though I don't have a contract and can leave whenever I want--five minutes notice and I'm packing my picture frames, I'd be really free to embrace the word.

Oprah

Uh, huh.

Libby

I would take the word and allow people not only to embrace it but to share it.

Now I have some notes...oh! will you look at this! All my advice columns! What are they doing in here?

Did you know I also write an advice column for Happy Woman?

Oprah

No I didn't.

Libby

Yes, I don't even charge extra. That's the kind of thing I do. Not that it's appreciated here. They treat me like crap. I'd be gone in five minutes if I had a better offer. I wouldn't even have to hand in my notice. If I had a boss who really understood my mission...

Oprah

And what mission is that?

Libby

Beg Pardon?

Oprah

What mission is that?

Libby

...Oh....it's to....read and embrace the word. A lot of reading, a lot of embracing. Spirit. For sure some spirit. And charity. I'm so into charity, why just last June I gave a hobo a Montclair fountain pen and half a tube of Estee Lauder's Perfect Just Blush #63.

Oprah

I see.

Libby

Here's a picture of me wearing it--that's Bobby Goldsboro on my left--one of my many celebrity contacts. I always laugh when people tell me how photogenic I am, that I have a face made for TV.

Oprah

Are you sure they didn't say radio?

Libby

Oh, a joke!!! I love jokes. Jokes are great.

I guess Oprah, what the world really wants to know is--Are you hiring any writers?

Oprah

No. Not at this time.

Libby

I bet you didn't know that I can sing. I know all the words to "Run On". Run On, Run On I believe I'll run on, see what the end will be...

Oprah

That's nice.

Libby

Probably most of your current writer's don't know the words to it.

Oprah

I don't know.

Libby

Because I think that's an important part of any job. Learning the boss' theme song.

Oprah

I think we're just about done here.

Libby

I also found my spirit about two weeks ago in a drug store, I was looking at greeting cards so I went home and wrote about it in my journal.

Oprah

That's nice.

Libby

....Well I guess you have to go I can't tell you what a pleasure it has been.

Never in my history have I ever interviewed someone who is so talented and beautiful.

Someone who just loves to reach out and give people a chance someone who remembers their humble roots in rural Mississippi, where I have never visited but have always secretly felt I belonged.

Someone who loves potatos as much as I would if I hadn't cut out starch in 1972. Someone who....

Oprah

I just really want to go now.

Libby

One last question Oprah, What does the "O"in the title stand for?


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Please Note: This is a parody of a magazine, so don't come crying to us if someone accidentally took out your liver or you starved to death on our diet. The interviews are not real and the interviewers are not real.

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