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John:

As I said, some projects are...

Libby:

Catholicism.

John:

Beg pardon?

Libby:

Catholicism. The Pope he was an actor right? I'm sure he's got a few properties hanging around--granted only Disney would touch them but..

John:

I don't know what you're getting at.

Libby:

What I'm saying John, is if you're going to make films that your religious leader has written, I'm suggesting you get someone with a better sense of story.

John:

I hope you don't mind if I change the subject but I'd like to talk about my new movie Swordfish which opens in theatres soon. I play Gabriel...

Libby:

Billy Graham?

John:

What?

Libby:

Billy Graham, he's even got his own show, am I right? And he wrote an autobiography Just As I Am which sounds like it might make a good chick flick.

Oh! Jim Bakker! His son has written a book Son of a Preacher Man--I see that as a song and dance movie which would be just perfect for you. A chance to slim down, get a hair cut-- it could do wonders for you.

John:

I don't know what to say.

Libby:

Or even my church! Why didn't I think of this!! It's on Rienta, used to be a health food store, it's a great religion. Easy to get into, great chance to network and as long as you make a donation you don't have to show up! And are you ready for this? My Minister has written a few screenplays!

I could hook you up if you want.

John:

No, that's OK, but thank you.

Libby:

He's got one property, the Bible done as a techno-thriller, that's a sure fire winner.

John:

I have to go.

Libby:

It has been an absolute pleasure speaking with you John. I'll give you my minister's card, it's very clever it's a tiny CD-ROM with all his work on it. He calls his company Soul Survivor isn't that cute?

One last question for you John. Could I stick my finger in your chin?

John:

No. No you can't.

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Please Note: This is a parody of a magazine, so don't come crying to us if someone accidentally took out your liver or you starved to death on our diet. The interviews are not real and the interviewers are not real.

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